Relationships Matter: How to Cultivate Winning Relationships at ASTD 2014 Networking

I firmly believe that the world of work is a team sport—the biggest team sport any of us get to play. This means we are dependent on others for our success. We must pay attention to how and when we cultivate professional relationships at work.

Events like ASTD 2014 offer a wonderful opportunity for networking, meeting new people, and reconnecting with past contacts. You’ve heard the phrase “six degrees of separation”; I have come to appreciate that in today’s world, it is more like “six degrees of connection.”

Here is a personal story to illustrate how closely we are connected. One morning I was sitting in the Anchorage airport, having just facilitated leadership programs at the Alaska North Slope. It was my first trip to Alaska, and I knew no one in Anchorage, let alone anyone sitting at the airport at four o’clock in the morning. The royal wedding was being broadcast on the screens in the terminal, and the lady next to me started to chat. Apparently I have an accent (if you attend my author chat you will hear it), and she wanted to talk about my life in England. It was early, and I wanted to see Kate’s wedding dress before boarding, so we talked. Eventually the conversation turned to current things. I shared that I lived in Colorado. She knew someone in Colorado—and it turned out that her friend was someone I know well. We immediately went from strangers with nothing in common to acquaintances with someone in common.

This is just one of hundreds of chance encounters I have experienced in my travels around the world—encounters that only serve to reinforce that we are just one conversation away from reaching our dreams, or at least taking a step closer to them. If we take the time to talk to those around us we can cultivate relationships that result in a positive and lasting impact for both of us.

. . . which brings me back to ASTD 2014. I’ve had the opportunity to speak at events around the world; and with more than 9,000 people registered, the ASTD 2014 international conference will be, by far, one of the largest. One thing I can almost certainly guarantee is that of those 9,000 people, most will hunt in packs. What do I mean by this? Most people will stay with their friends and colleagues, eat together, sit together, chat together. Very few will have the courage to break out, meet new people, and make new connections.

If the idea of trying to meet 9,000 strangers scares the daylights out of you, don’t panic. I’m not suggesting you try to meet everyone, but do set yourself the goal of meeting, say, five new people every day. I don’t mean simply collecting business cards; instead take the time to stop and talk. Get to know people and find out what they hope to gain from ASTD 2014. Spend 10 minutes in a real conversation.

Whether you find it easy to strike up a conversation with a stranger or you’re someone who has a hard time meeting and talking to new people, networking and cultivating winning relationships is a necessary skill if you're looking to get ahead.

With that in mind, here are some tips to help prepare you to be different, break from the safety of the herd, forge new relationships that may open up new possibilities for you, and ensure your time at ASTD 2014 is a success.

Build Your Network

• Start before you arrive. There are only a few days left before the conference. Review the agenda and speaker bios, check your social media connections to see who is attending and who you might like to meet, and then contact them via email, LinkedIn, or Twitter. Work out how you can potentially help them and add value to their organization, not just how they might be of use to you.

• Practice your “hello.” I hate the term “elevator pitch”—it sounds contrived. However the intent is positive; you need to think about how to say “hello,” introduce who you are, and give a little context as to why you are at ASTD 2014. Your “hello” or introduction should be 30 seconds or less. Make it genuine and remember the intent is to open up a conversation, not simply to toot your own horn! Also remember to bring plenty of business cards (tuck them into the back of your conference name tag). It always amazes me how many people leave these at home.

• Get out of your comfort zone. Sit with someone new for lunch, hang out near the coffee station, or talk to the person who sits next to you! You may be surprised at just how connected you are when you take the time to ask a few questions. Remember, relationships are not just for today. This new contact could be your boss, colleague, or client next month or next year.

• Ask questions. A powerful way to get introduced to people is to ask questions during the Q&A sessions. Stand up, introduce your name, role, and company, and ask your question. Afterward you can reintroduce yourself to the people in that session, I promise some will remember you and proactively come and find you!

Maintain Your Network

• Connect. I use LinkedIn to keep in touch with my contacts. Send a personal invitation (not the standard wording) to the people you would like to remain in contact with. You can do this during the conference or when you get home.

• Follow up. If you promised to send information, make sure you remember to do so. I write reminders for myself on the business cards I receive.

• Stay in touch. There is a new tool on LinkedIn that allows you to set reminders to get in touch with people (open a profile, click on “relationships” and then reminders). Look for opportunities to send a quick congratulations message, or an article with a “thought of you” message. Ask for help and input from your network; you may just receive a suggestion you hadn’t considered.

Share Your Network

• In my book, Cultivate: The Power of Winning Relationships, I talk about the concepts of generosity and abundance, one of the four elements of an “ally.” The most successful people are the ones who share their network and expertise; they give more than they take. Make introductions, share your wisdom, and build a reputation for being the go-to person.

What about your existing network?

This blog has focused on creating new relationships. My book Cultivate (available in the ASTD Store during the conference) builds on this and explores how to nurture your existing connections and build “ally relationships.” If you’ve been blindsided by a colleague—or if you are plagued with the worst of office politics, shifting alliances, and silos—then make sure you attend my author chat on Tuesday, May 6, at 12:45 p.m. in the ASTD Store (Salon GHI).

You can add my author chat to your schedule before you get to ASTD 2014. Space is limited so book your seat early! I would love to meet and connect with you, so please come by and meet my team and me at the SkyeTeam booth 841.

Feel free to connect with me before May, and don’t forget the personal message! Also, remember that business is personal and relationships do matter.

Join more than 9,000 of your learning colleagues from around the globe in Washington, D.C., May 4-7, 2014, to share best practices and insights at the ASTD 2014 International Conference & Exposition .

Twitter: @skyemorag

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LinkedIn: Morag Barrett

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