ATD Blog
Tue Mar 12 2013
One of my greatest life-changing experiences was taking the Lee Ross-facilitated course, 7 Habits of Highly Effective People Signature. Those three days in 2012 were literally like the first three days of my new life. During that time, I learned so much about myself, my desires, and what I truly want out of life. One of the greatest lessons for me was Habit #4: In order to achieve various short- and long-range goals, it is imperative to seek out win-win alternatives when working interdependently.
The 4th habit sounds really good in theory, but it’s really hard in practice—and especially in higher education. For most of us, there’s a lot of self-motivation behind our initiative to increase our knowledge base, and a lot less concern about our classmates, professors, or what anyone else needs or thinks. This is a natural disposition, and there’s no reason to be ashamed of it. However, once we get into the classroom, we quickly learn about group assignments and additional requests from professors outside of the realm of the syllabi. Many of us begin to wonder, “Is this really what the heck I signed up for?”
Depending on who you ask, the answer is “Absolutely.” You did sign up for a program that would result in a new credential for yourself; you also signed up for an opportunity to affect other people’s lives via the class experience. Therefore, when we have the opportunity to participate in group work, take on an extra assignment, or even go above and beyond on what’s assigned, we must commit to thinking of the win-win situation that this could produce and decide to push full steam ahead.
I know…this is much easier said than done. Here is some advice on how to make win-win a reality.
Practice empathy. Walk a mile in the other person’s moccasins. If you were on the other end of this situation, how would you want others to approach, address, and work with you? Provide your answers and actions with this in mind.
Start with the END in mind. This is another effective “Coveyism.” If you remember the end goal, you never have to worry about the means to get there unless something immoral, unethical, or indecent exposes itself. Keep the goal at the forefront of your brain, and you’ll be able to use a win-win mindset to accomplish your goals.
Again, I know…this is easier said than done. Here are a couple of ideas that you can do today to help you embrace a win-win mindset.
Read the 7 Habits of Highly Effective People. Pay close attention to Habit #4, and think of instances when you can use a win-win mindset in pursuit of your goals.
Find ways to use the win-win mindset in your professional and personal life. We know that there’s no way to flip a switch and immediately stop berating a co-worker (or boss or spouse) when they suggest something that you believe makes no common sense. Therefore, practice sticking to what you can control (your end goal) and help those around you achieve what they want to accomplish while meeting your own needs.
It’s just that simple. Really! It is! Now, I didn’t say that it was easy—because it’s not. However, if you commit to implementing these simple tips, you’re well on your to developing a win-win mindset
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