Seek: How Curiosity Can Transform Your Life and Change the World

By Scott Shigeoka

Balance, 256 pp., $30

We've all been in one of "those" conversations where someone shares an opposing view without knowing it's an opposing view. Maybe it's about how to raise a family or whom the country should legally recognize in marriage or generalized statements about a group of people or enthusiasm for a particular political candidate. Those conversations are our chance to engage in curiosity. In Seek, Shigeoka shares research-based approaches to strengthen curiosity about the world and its people into a "deep curiosity" superpower to strengthen relationships, connect to the world, and be happier.

Shigeoka shares personal experiences he used as part of his research to develop the DIVE model, which stands for detach, intend, value, embrace. The model is simple yet sound in its research and foundation; it presents actionable ways to build deep curiosity, which Shigeoka sums up as asking questions to open your mind to other viewpoints and experiences.

The book includes many examples of DIVE as well as practices and applications. Shigeoka is clear that the model is not a linear approach or checklist-based solution; it's a holistic offering of tools to try and practice.

Detach invites people to let go of their ABCs: assumptions, biases, and certainty. Engaging in the world with deep curiosity means working intentionally, not simply to validate what you already know, but also to be prepared to look for times to be an "admitter" and declare when you are wrong.

Intend is about the science and experience of setting and living an intention to build deep curiosity. With scientific evidence behind the model, Shigeoka shares a glimpse into how the human brain works and helps us see more of what we should see and less of what we'd like to see.

Value teaches us to value everyone, including ourselves. Witnessing everybody's dignity is important to achieving deep curiosity because, without seeing each person as real and deserving of dignity, we may find it easier to write off their ideas, points of view, or ways of living.

Embrace outlines practical ways to accept the challenges we will encounter in the final step of the model through research-based mindfulness approaches such as movement, self-commitments, and intentional observation in moments of curiosity.

Shigeoka finishes by sharing deep curiosity's limitations. He encourages readers to share their learning and experience with others, which can be beneficial for those just starting the journey.